Relationship Fitness

S13 Communication Basics E8: Use Timeouts When Necessary

In “Relationship Workout for Men,” Season 13 Episode 8 titled “Use Timeouts When Necessary,” Vince discusses the importance of recognizing when conversations are escalating beyond productive discourse and the wisdom in calling a timeout. He underscores the value of taking a break to prevent anger or anxiety from boiling over and ensuring both partners are in a calm, peaceful, and open mindset before resuming difficult conversations. Vince emphasizes the strategy of mutually agreeing on a time to revisit the discussion, ensuring both parties are fully present and committed to engaging effectively. This episode guides listeners on employing timeouts as a constructive communication tool, aiming to foster healthier interactions and prevent regrettable outbursts in heated moments.

Welcome to Relationship Workout for Men, a podcast dedicated to helping men be intentional in choosing a better partner, and being a better partner for the person they choose.

Season 13 Episode 8: Use Timeouts When Necessary

In this episode, we explore Relationship Workout Communication Basic #7: Use Timeouts When Necessary

Let’s say the conversation is getting heated, and you’re feeling the anger and/or anxiety start to reach a boil. Or let’s say she seems to have lost it to her Demon side.

By all means, stop and call a timeout before things get further out of hand. But don’t forget to agree to the time when you’ll come back and give the conversation another try.

There’s nothing shameful about making sure you’re in a calm, peaceful and open place before proceeding having a difficult conversation. And even though the issue may feel burning hot in the moment, most issues can wait before re-engaging.

On a parallel point, make sure you’re both 100% ready and able to talk before returning to have the conversation. There’s nothing more frustrating than trying to talk to someone whose head is somewhere else. 

Likewise, it’s extremely frustrating to have the other person try to force a conversation down your throat when you aren’t in a place to show up 100%.

In other words. if one or both people can’t give 100% of their time and attention (whether because of a time-out or any other reason), then:

1.     Mutually agree on another time to have the discussion, and

2.     Keep your commitment for when you’ve agreed to talk.

Taking a timeout seems pretty straightforward but believe me it can be difficult to have the awareness to call a timeout if you’re starting to lose it. That said, by all means call a timeout before you do lose it, saying something out of anger that you’ll likely regret once you’ve cooled down and have a more level head about you.

So that’s a quick summary of Relationship Workout Communication Basic #7: Use Timeouts When Necessary.

Next, we turn our attention to Relationship Workout Communication Basic #8: Listen Before Resolving.

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